The Trump administration is staffed almost exclusively by guys who saw Full Metal Jacket and decided to root for the drill sergeant. Obviously, that describes Pete Hegseth, whose whole persona is “Gunnery Sergeant Hartman attitude and Private Pyle physique,” but it runs throughout the administration. Screaming slurs and bullying people is the whole MAGA ethos. And Todd Blanche clearly has it, because he speaks fluent Sgt. Hartman.
According to Regime Change, the new Maggie Haberman and Jonathan Swan account of Trump’s second term, Blanche had a vivid forecast for what would happen if the DOJ stumbled into federal court to push a series of revenge indictments. Roger Parloff of Lawfare surfaced the passage:
Todd Blanche confided to colleagues that he was concerned about appointing someone a judge might regard as an illegitimate appointee to bring these high-profile cases. After the sugar high of “indicted” headlines wore off, he explained, they would be left with cases that were almost certainly going to be dismissed, and they would spend the next six months “getting skullfucked” by judges — Blanche’s colorful shorthand for long and detailed judicial objections.
Check out MAGA Cassandra over here.
Lindsey Halligan — a former insurance lawyer and Trump favorite — got installed as the not-really-genuine-US Attorney for the Eastern District of Virginia to pursue indictments against James Comey and Letitia James only to see both cases fail miserably. The skullfucking arrived precisely on schedule.
Haberman and Swan describe it as, “Blanche’s colorful shorthand for long and detailed judicial objections,” but cinephiles know it as one of Full Metal Jacket‘s most entertaining rants:
Which is the strange, almost encouraging part. As of a few months ago, Blanche apparently worried about losing court cases. Worrying about losing implies Blanche harbored a flickering residual commitment to honor court orders. That’s significant when he served in this administration with Emil Bove, who reportedly instructed DOJ lawyers to tell federal judges “fuck you” if the courts ruled against the administration. Now Bove is a federal judge… because we live in hell.
More from Haberman and Swan’s book:
But Trump was losing patience. On the morning of September 24, when the President arrived in the Oval Office, he declared to an aide that he thought he needed to fire both Bondi and Blanche. “They don’t do anything,” he said angrily, pointing out yet again that prosecutors from the other side had never seemed to have any trouble going after him.
Here’s where that encouraging feeling withers. Because Bondi is gone and Blanche is not only still around, but auditioning for the top job. Not to read too much into it, but that suggests Blanche has convinced Trump he’ll do his job as Trump’s personal lawyer and embrace whatever skullfucking may follow.
Joe Patrice is a senior editor at Above the Law and co-host of Thinking Like A Lawyer. Feel free to email any tips, questions, or comments. Follow him on Twitter or Bluesky if you’re interested in law, politics, and a healthy dose of college sports news.
The post Todd Blanche Feared Judges Giving It To DOJ In Extremely Uncomfortable Place appeared first on Above the Law.
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